From Sharp Health News, a publication of Sharp HealthCare
The next time you make a mistake, stop and take a moment to listen to your inner voice. What is it telling you? If you find negative thoughts and criticism seeping in, switch the narrative to remind yourself that nobody is perfect, and everyone makes mistakes sometimes. Reframing how we speak to ourselves is as important as how we speak to our loved ones.
Your inner voice, or self-talk, is a running narration of your daily experiences. It’s a combination of conscious thoughts and unconscious beliefs, developed throughout your life in reaction to things people have said to you, ways in which people have related to you, and how you felt about yourself in various scenarios.
Self-talk shapes how you treat yourself and how you approach and engage in the world around you. It’s important to use self-talk that creates a balanced narrative, acknowledging your missteps as well as your successes.
Try these three tips to positively influence your self-talk — and increase your self-love:
- Examine the external. You are bombarded with images and messages daily via the media you consume and the people you’re with. It’s important to recognize that what you are seeing and hearing directly contributes to how you think and feel about yourself. Pause and ask yourself how you feel when you engage with these images and messages or when you’re around certain people. You get to decide who you spend time with and what messages you want to receive, so choose what positively influences your thinking and feeling.
- Revisit your values. When you are making a change within yourself, there is a ripple effect to those around you. Recognize that you can break negative cycles by identifying and aligning your behaviors with the most important values. Try to live your values in all situations and encourage those around you to do the same. Set a good example by guarding your mind from destructive messages and spreading your own messages of kindness, authenticity, and self-love.
- Practice prioritizing yourself. It’s important to cultivate a practice where you prioritize yourself. Do you avoid things that don’t fit into your positive narrative? Do you stand up for things that truly matter the most to you? Do you seek out those who “feed” you rather than drain you? The things you focus on — good or bad — will lead to the emotions you experience. Instead of focusing on what you are lacking, focus on the good you have in your life and set goals to pursue the other things you want.
Imagine what your life looks like when you talk kindly to yourself, treat yourself well, and love yourself. Then, put those thoughts into practice to manifest that life.
As a VEBA member, you have access to Optum Dedicated Onsite Consultants. This Optum partnership allows you to receive assistance quickly for a variety of issues — from stress and relationship issues to communication strategies and beyond. This is a no-cost service to VEBA beneficiaries only.
Appointments are available:
- In-person at the VRC – Kearny Mesa location
- Virtually by phone or video consultation
To schedule a consultation, click here.
Through Optum, you and your dependents can also schedule consultations through Emotional Wellbeing Solutions. Please note: you may experience longer wait times with this option. To schedule an appointment through Optum directly, call 888-625-4809 or visit liveandworkwell.com (Access Code: VEBA).
